Sunday, April 17, 2011

STANDARDS are great !!! BUT......

So I stumbled unto an episode of the Oprah Show where these two ladies had lists of standards for a partner. This was one lady's list "Black man, 6'2, athletic body, 230 pounds, straight white teeth (all 32), God fearing, Attends service regularly, Millionaire, Sense of humor, Ambitious, Generous, family oriented, sports spectator but not fanatic, has friends but also independent, Nice, sincere and generous, faithful and honest, determined to make our love and romance last, adventurous, sexually compatible, educated and intelligent, home-owner, can dance or willing to learn, wants to marry, loves to travel, entertaining, romantic, nice shoes, respects all women, clean and tidy, wants at least 2 children, healthy and spontaneous, loves to cook, drug free."
The other girl had similar points but this was really the eye-catcher for me, she said "willing and able to bring me to ORGASM both sexually and ORALLY". 

I say these women are looking for THE LORD....what do y'all say?................Well, welcome to yet another discussion !!!

So this piece is about standards. I believe every person has what he/she looks for in a partner. In Ghana for example, I believe every guy has heard these infamous words from a female "Tall, dark and handsome". These are words a lot of girls say when they talk about physical attributes they want in a man. I am NOT tall so I'm probably a hater, that's just for the record.

Personally I believe standards are GREAT to have, especially for a lady. Its good to have your own and also look for a match in other people so you don't settle for less. Honestly, a real man respects a woman with a standard because that tells us that you know what you are worth and you expect to be treated with love and care as a woman should.

The problem is, a lot of women are not willing to be what they want a guy to be for them. In the list you saw earlier, this one girl wanted a man that could get her to climax both orally and sexually. Hey!! if that's your standard, I am fine with that, but my question is " CAN YOU DO THE EXACT SAME THING FOR THE MAN ?". If you can, I wish you luck in finding 'the LORD', but if you cannot, then check that out of your list madam.

The point is, you cannot get what you want without making sacrifices. You've got to give something to get something. Say you want a millionaire, as one girl stated in her list, thing is "Do you know what a millionaire guy wants" ?. If you are ready to be that for him, then you can keep that in the list and go looking for one. I don't know if you guys watch the reality TV show "Basketball wives", if you do, you would understand what is takes to be a wife of a millionaire athlete. These women know their husbands cheat on them but they cannot say a word. They sit at home while their men move from city to city playing basketball. That's what pays the bills and enable these women to look good each passing hour, shopping and spending lavishly. The risk to that is, they probably have to share their men with a thousand other women. Are you ready to commit to that ? Well if you are, go look for an athlete, if not, please check that off your list and look for a guy with a 9 to 5 job... POINT BLANK !!

With that being said, Lists or standards are great to have and everyone should have them. But in order to be realistic in finding what you want, you've got to be able to put yourself in others shoes. These ladies I mentioned earlier were 37 and 32 years old respectively, wondering why they hadn't met the men of their dreams. That's just because they are looking for something that doesn't exist and to notice that and make reasonable choices, one has to be able to see themselves achieving those same standards they set out for the other partner.

Thanks for reading y'all....Deuces ✌✌ !!