I’ve been working on
a post called “Money made me do it” for a while. That was actually the post I had to publish after the last one. But my experience with Mr Gbozo, the painter, was so
ill that I had to write about that instead.
One night when I was
with my boy Leroy watching episode 7 of “Start up”, I asked him who had done the
paintjob on his house and he said “Mister Gbozo”.“Mister Gbozo? What’s
with the Mister?”, I asked. He responded “he’s OLD”. Mind you, Leroy has always hooked me up with artisans, but I’ve never heard him call none of them 'Mister'. Its usually Richard - the
electrician, Richie - the plumber, Moses - the mason, Daniel - the ceiling guy, etc. So
I asked him “Dude, like how old?”. He looks me dead in the eye and repeats
“OOLD”. I took his number, called him and arranged to meet Wednesday, the following week.
Wednesday came
quickly and we agreed that morning to meet at my neighborhood, close to Leroy’s
home, at 9 am. I was on time, you know, first impressions and all that. But
most importantly, I didn’t want to keep an old man waiting. Maybe he had a bad
hip, who knows. So I picked him up, went to show him the place and later
agreed to go to the Coral Store to get the paint we needed.
Mr. Gbozo is old indeed.
Mr. Gbozo only spoke English, and Mr Gbozo never spoke unless he was
spoken to. And Oh! When I met Mr. Gbozo he was leaning on a pole just before I
picked him up. My guess is, he has a bad hip for real. In short, Mr. Gbozo was
a character and it was about to be a long afternoon.
We spent about an
hour at the Coral store. To a point where the store keeper was getting
inpatient with us. Why? Because Mr Gbozo didn’t want to chip in at all. I’ll say “I want the walls to be green, do you think it’ll match the brown
floor and white ceiling?”. Then he’ll say with a smile “Umm, I don’t know, it’s your
work, so”. I’ll later again ask “Mr Gbozo, Is the red too bright for the doors or
does it need to be mixed first?”, He’d respond “Umm, maybe. But I don’t know, it’s
your work, so”. “Damn, this man has got no opinions? I asked myself. So I happened to get all the
paint we needed, no thanks to Mr. Gbozo, and now it was time to check the prices
and pay.
I step out for a
minute to get something from the vehicle and when I return, Mr Gbozo has a pen
and paper and I notice him working something out on paper. I figured he was doing
some estimations so I didn’t bother. I kept going around the store
looking at different colors. After a couple of minutes, I returned and saw
the lady at the store furious. I noticed Mr Gbozo was still working out his
math. I got closer and realized he was actually summing up the prices of the
paint we had chosen. Do y'all remember how we used to do arithmetic like 20 years
ago when calculators weren’t around? I’m talking about “carry one”, “remainder
one” sort of stuff - like grade-1 math. That was what Mr. Gbozo was doing.
I saw his paper and was like “Ah! Mr. Gbozo, what are you doing? Are you doing
calculations here?”. He said “Yea”. I was a little frustrated and like “Ah,
Mr. Gbozo, do you see a money counter, a laptop and that big ass calculator
right next to you? I thought you were even working out an amount for discount.
This is a big store, nobody has time for carry ones and remainder twos oo”. He
smiles and says “Okay, we can use the calculator. It’s your work, so”. I had to
laugh that one off. What’s with this man and the term “It’s your work, so”, I
thought.
So we buy the buckets
we need, put them at the back of the vehicle and take them away. I go to drop
off Mr. Gbozo on my way home and just before he gets off, he says “You know if
you get me another job, we can negotiate your share and you can get a cut from
it”. I looked at him dead in the eye and thought “So you know how to initiate conversation?
This man hadn’t said a word the whole trip and when he finally does, he decides
to negotiate a monetary deal with me? SMH. I couldn’t even be mad at him. At least,
he is about his money. I respected that.
After he alighted, I
called my friend Leroy, and said “Yo, but wey painter you give me no?”. He responds
“Oh! you met Mr. Gbozo, didn’t you? I told you he was OLD...and not just OLD but
he's the embodiment of the term OLD”. Couldn’t help but laugh. I said "Bruh this is different, my Dad is older and he isn't like this". Leroy says "But your Dad isn't a painter, is he?. Then I reply "What are you saying? you mean something about smelling paint your whole life makes you hate the times we are in?". He laughed and said "Oh, you saw that too? How many hours were you with him?". I said "Long enough bro". He asked "Have you seen him eat? ...."NO, and I do not want to see either. Thanks for offering though" I replied. ๐ ...That was enough for a day
Mr. Gbozo will
definitely come up in conversation when we watch episode 8 of “START UP” for
sure. Can’t wait.
Shout out to the hommie Leroy (aka YayyYayy). Much Love!
Thanks for reading y'all......Peaceeee ✌
Mr. GBOZO in your shot. Check out his stance. I knew he had a bad hip ๐
I came in to see Mr. Gbozo like this....thinking he was estimating something. Boy was I wrong.
Mr. Gbozo remembered his old school days. This man is definitely not going along with the times. This is what I call "Stuck in the 50s". Do y'all realize his calculations are even incorrect ?? haha
There lie a calculator, a money counter and a laptop right next to Mr. Gbozo. This man just didn't give a damn. ๐
Carry ONE, Remainder ONE
Mr. Gbozo will love this, wouldn't he?
You do too well with narration.Kudos on this one!
ReplyDeleteI didn't breathe reading.Next time, I'll need a glass of water in case I choke.
Mr.Gboza ����������
Thanks man. Yeah, next time get a tall glass of water. I don't want mubaraksmind to be tried for murder.
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